So I haven’t posted in forever, mostly because of NEVER-ENDING WEDDING FEVER, aka: I got married, deal with it.
Above, you can see some of the things that took over all of my time over the last few months. Those bouquets? Weeks of work. WEEKS. FUCK YOU, ORIGAMI FLOWERS. Worth it, though. I’ll post more photos this week. Currently I’m enjoying makeshift homemade chocolate. Mmm… stuff I found in my kitchen on a plate. It’s what’s for dinner!
My wife and I with our best Phil Jones Faces. Plus the original for comparison.
Alex went to extra effort and made her hair match too.
I’ve never reblogged something, but this is worth it.
Quick post: I made chocolate sugar cookies for work yesterday. All of then ended up covered in statements like, “I MISS MY EX,” “WHERE’S MY CHILD SUPPORT,” “LET’S END THIS,” “FACEBOOK STALK ME,” and more.
I have no idea why anyone lets me do anything.
I know it’s been raining for what feels like forever, but I’ve had it up to here with this lousy Smarch weather. I miss when it was a choice to be damp and shitty rather than just a boring reality.
Also, I don’t know who this kid is. Sorry, kid.
I did a shoot with Rulers of the Universe recently (great troupe, check them out OR ELSE. I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL FIND YOU, DAMNIT). While the article that featured my photos used a different shot (and also cropped it bizarrely. I swear that there is more to the photo and that I didn’t submit a shot that looks like the guy on the couch is trying to grab that girl’s crotch), this one has to be my favourite. The dog belongs to the guy who lives at the shoot location and was running around mid-shoot. It was in full “OH MY GOD PEOPLE I MUST LICK AND JUMP ON” mode, so I just ended up waiting until the dog ran onto the couch, then yelled, “RINGO!” and caught the only second of it looking at the camera before charging face-first into my torso. Worth it, though.
OH GOD I’M BACK.
So for Halloween (AGES AGO) Andy and I went as The Lich and Princess Bubblegum, respectively. In case you’re thinking, “Who are these people? Are you actually pink? How did you make these costumes? What’s the capital of Nunavut?”, well, here are your answers:
1) The Lich (http://bit.ly/SltA0l) and Princess Bubblegum (http://bit.ly/PAQxNT) are characters from the show Adventure Time. If you don’t know what that is, you either are the worst at Tumblr or seriously, just Google it. What am I, your e-mom? For those who are familiar with the show, I based my costume on PB’s dress from “Death In Bloom.”
2) No, I am not normally this pink. I used Ben Nye MagiCake Aqua Paint in CF-135 (it’s a light purple, since her skin is sort of a weird light pinky-purplish colour rather than a straight pink) that I covered myself in, which I then covered and sealed with a light dusting of a hot pink pigment powder mixed with a finishing powder. Andy is coated in about 17 layers of various kinds of makeup. Also, the eyes are not photoshopped. I just used a reflective green eyeshadow on him to get the glow.
3) Alright, I cheated. I basically layered a few pieces of clothing from around the house, then bought some pink fabric that I tucked into my dress for the sleeves/belt. Andy’s costume was made about 3 hours before going out and is held together with horrible stitching, safety pins, and my tortured screams.
Holy schmoly, thanks! I guess this means I should start updating again, huh? NOTE TO SELF: Put up some damn photos.
Also, I just checked out your illustration blog and you’ve got some good stuff up there. Keep it up, it’s looking great :D. I haven’t done figure drawings in ages (well, since graduating university), but I feel like I always ended up sitting in the one spot in the room where the person would be like, “HERE, HERE ARE MY GENITALS, YOU CAN’T HELP BUT DRAW THEM NOW BECAUSE I AM THRUSTING AT YOU.” I hope your experiences are less… awkward, I guess. Is awkward the right word? Whatever.
This is the most bullshit Tumblr thing I’ve ever done. Stick a fork in me. RIGHT IN THE FACE, I DON’T DESERVE TO LIVE ANYMORE.
These shoes rule, though.
I normally don’t like posting myself, but whatever. Check out my sweet hair. Thanks, everyone at VS Toronto! You guys rule.
Before you ask, I made the shirt myself, bloodstains and all. Who’s blood? Who cares.
Oh shiiiiii-… I’m back.
I’m back and with photos of the TFC - LFC game that I went to not too long ago. More photos to come. I’m looking at you, guys I took photos of breakdancing. They’ll be up soon.
Apologies for the mediocre quality of these photos. As you can probably guess, these were not taken from ground level. Instead, I just sat up in the 200s near the loudest, drunkest guy in the stadium (ok, maybe not the loudest OR drunkest, but I was considering bottling him). SPORTS.
And now, a personal text piece. You have been warned.
Boston Magazine recently ran a fantastic piece about the stress musicians are under when auditioning for the Boston Symphony Orchestra, one of the top orchestras in the world. If you’re a non-musician and are wondering what it would be like to audition for a spot in one of the Big 5 orchestras, think of it this way: If you’re a writer, this is your pitch to the New Yorker. If you’re an athlete, this is your shot at going to the Olympics. If you’re a student, this is your application to Harvard. It’s touched on in the piece, but part of the reason why a spot in the BSO is so coveted is because it comes with the perks that a lot of other musician jobs don’t have, such as a good paycheck, benefits, and the knowledge that you will keep your job for as long as you can properly hold your own onstage. Like any job in the arts, most music-related positions are fraught with poverty, no job security, and long stretches of tedium, but if you work like mad, you can maybe - just maybe - land a spot in a Big 5 orchestra. Then you can look out over the reams of failed applicants and go, “Whatever dude, I fucking made it. I got it all.”
I’m writing about this here because I am a failed musician. I say “failed” because when I was younger, I had one of those misguided dreams that I would become some sort of super-magical pianist. It’s silly when I think about it now, but fuck it, when you’re 17 the world is still kind of fantastic and big and you can do anything baby, as long as you set your mind to it. I was going to study music at the University of Toronto, and by gum, it was going to be awesome. In short, the world was my maraca.
It’s another drawing! This time, a titmouse is going to RUIN YOUR LIFE. STOP GIGGLING AT IT’S NAME DAMNIT, IT KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE.
I know this isn’t a photo, but who cares (not me, obviously). Anyway, I’ve been bored and making a series of Unnatural Predators, such as the Thugxolotl. It’s adorable AND it has a butterfly knife! It’s weakness is iodine, because once you hit it with that it just turns into a wussy salamander, and nuts to salamanders.
Andy generally falls asleep to the gentle sound of shutter clicks. And occasionally the sound of me tripping over my desk chair and smashing my shin into the bed and swearing a lot. He doesn’t really get a lot of sleep, now that I think about it.
Also, side note: Want a way to avoid going for a run? Get your inner arm tattoo touched up! It’ll be really uncomfortable and you’ll have no desire to move your arms around. Instead, sit around watching soccer recaps while doing crosswords and drinking mint tea. MUCH BETTER.
Tom did a shoot involving this head in my apartment. He left the head behind, so I did the only logical thing and took it out with me to the Eatons Centre. Not pictured: The small child Andy and I terrified and had to convince that Andy was not actually some sort of evil half-man half-tiger giant headed freak.